Feeling Sad on Birthday? Here's Why You Don't Have to Feel Ashamed - A Millennial Woman
Life & Relationships

Birthday Depression: What Makes Birthdays Absolutely Hard for You

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Birthdays are special, birthdays are fun! And every one of us is ‘supposed’ to be happy on our birthday. However, many of us feel the exact opposite, they feel sad and depressed on or around their birthday. I felt too. And that’s why friends, I can tell you that you don’t need to feel ashamed of your birthday depression.

What made my birthdays sad…

Since my mom’s death three years ago, I didn’t have the same zeal to celebrate my birthday. But this year it was different and dreadful.

That adamant wish to just stay in bed, not to talk to anyone at all (not even my family), and hate towards the birthday cake.

I absolutely felt deprived of happiness. I felt depressed.

This is why you may suffer from birthday depression

Feeling Sad on Birthday? Here's Why You Don't Have to Feel Ashamed

Birthday depression is real, friends. But I feel the softer terms like birthday sadness or birthday blues (like Monday morning blues) undermine how low we feel on the inside.

I celebrated my birthday this month and here’re my reasons that made my birthday unhappy.

Family problems or relationship stress

I’ve been dealing with the relationship stress for five months now. If anything nothing has made the situation better. I left my husband’s house two months ago and have been living at my dad’s since.

Feeling Sad on Birthday? Here's Why You Don't Have to Feel Ashamed

I knew my birthday this year was going to be a bit sad as my close family is upset (and somewhat angry) with me for the situation I brought up upon my 5-months old marriage and both sides of families.

What can I say, in this age also, a woman is always to be blamed for all the relationship problems.

I was feeling ashamed and somewhat guilty for having to stay at my dad’s house. When my dad didn’t wish me on my birthday, things started to get worse.

I left for my work that morning in haste without uttering a word to anyone. What got to me the most was when my father didn’t even try to stop me as he would always do.

I wanted to throw a feat and cry like a baby right in the middle of the lobby.

Your age, that feeling of getting old

27 is not a bad number, unless it’s your age!

Yeah, I turned 27 this month and I feel so old already! I’m not usually that obsessed with age (maybe a little) but my family didn’t make it any easier.

Every time my aunt met me, she wouldn’t stop talking about how I was getting older and how girls my age are married with two kids already (oh man, give me a break from that!).

Feeling Sad on Birthday? Here's Why You Don't Have to Feel Ashamed

Entering your late twenties is such a horrible thing! It feels like the whole world is taunting about your age.

Your family is no help and friends? Well, literally half of my friends got married this past year and must I say they all seem to be HAPPILY married including my EX!

Did you get the memo? Well, to soothe my poor aching heart I tuned in my favorite artists. I thought listening to their music will cheer me like it always have.

But the minute their songs started to blast my ears, the only thought came crashing back and filled my mind – ‘Oh, they are so good at this’ and ‘how they’ve managed to rule the world with their talent’ and ‘they’re younger than me!’.

Internet, social media, and magazines were even worse. Seriously ladies, we should turn off the notifications of these social monsters on our birthdays (when we’re feeling sad that is).

All they do is throw the news and goody words about how people our age (or younger) have become fashion icons, Instagram influencers, successful bloggers, or self-made millionaires. You don’t need to feel more like shit on your birthday (or ever)!

Other reasons that could make you suffer from birthday depression…

Well, these monster of reasons made me feel sad on my birthday. Your reasons for suffering from birthday depression could be different, maybe one of these:

  • You’re stressed or already suffering from depression
  • Family history of depression
  • Introverts can get birthday blues
  • Other mental illness
  • Physical illness

You don’t need to feel ashamed of your birthday blues…

It’s alright to feel sad or angry on your birthday. It happens to the best of us. What makes many of us feel ashamed of our birthday depression is the reason that:

  • We’re ‘supposed’ to feel happy on our birthday
  • We feel guilty for feeling bad
  • We can’t accept feeling sad on or around our birthday
  • People around us may misunderstand our birthday depression
  • We deny being sad or depressed due to fear of rejection

Don’t let yourself or others make you feel bad, guilty, or ashamed of your emotions on or around your birthday. Just as I conquered mine you can beat your birthday blues too.

But very first thing you’d have to do is accept that you’re not happy on your own birthday and don’t try to act or convince yourself otherwise.

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Copywriter by profession, an aspiring author, and a curious cat! I love to read, write and explore new things in life. My only motto is 'Live life to the fullest!' and of course help other women to do the same. Embrace the way you are, ladies! Follow your passion, grab the opportunities as they come. Easier said than done, I know. But I'm here to share my secret sauce of work-life-relationship balance as I get on with my life. I very much hope that helps...